Most of you know this already - We are EXPECTING our 4th little person.....5th pregnancy, 4th baby.... Anyhow, to back up a bit....
Last Easter (as in 2011) we decided to spend it in California - Ridgecrest to be exact with my hubs family. Grandma, Papa, Aunts, Uncles and Cousins, and second cousins - then decided to make it OUR thing. To be able to spend a sweet holiday with our family means alot to us - being so far away and all. So this year we made our way down there - our first time in our new-ish van. It was a piece of cake trip down. The kids did fantastic and so did we :) We arrived the Friday before Easter and had a quick meal with Papa, Great Grandma, Aunt Bethie, the girls ,Auntie and UJ. The next day Uncle Noah and Auntie Bren showed up. It was a calm and relaxing time with all of them.
I knew that my (NOT SO MONTHLY FRIEND) was going to be arriving any day and was fully prepared. Ever since loosing our sweet Joy in November - my periods have not been the same - and if i didnt like them before i dreaded them coming now. California was not the ideal place to start this mess, but we were here and i needed to embrace IT.....
We ate, laughed, enjoyed one another and then found out through a nervous, but excited Auntie Bren that there was going to be another little baby in the family. More hugs and more laughter was going on... I on the other hand, kept my excitement of this little miracle baby to my self. Not that i wasent happy or so thrilled i could have screamed it from the roof of Grandmas house - but because i was a wee bit sad... So happy for them, a little pitty party for me... I talked with Grandma that evening and she told me she understood, and so would they. I do love her....
That night with Grandma- like every night there- was spent talking about Nana, TV shows and family drama ( which i kind of love hearing about) She also introduced a new show to us - Missing... it was great and Gabe and I got hooked.
Anyhow.....
The next morning we got up, got ready for church. We arrived to alot of very familiar faces... Grandma's church consist of at least 25% of family.... We sat through service , kids did great. Great Cousin Ricky made Eli a paper airplane while church was going on and we tried to sing songs that we have never heard before... It was just like old times :)
After service we went to our usual spot to take family pictures (which are all on my camera that i lost in Cali :( so you won't see a whole lot on here.... but heres a few....
We made our way back to Grandma's house to eat, have fellowship and to watch our kiddo's search for Easter egg's out in Grandma's dirt yard.
It was good good day.
The next day we said our goodbye's to Great Grandma and headed to SC. We stopped at IN N OUT :)
Then headed to my brother in law's parents house. We always stay with them and love it there. Our kids even refer to them as Grammy and Uncle. We arrived and relaxed till it was time to go have dinner with Auntie Bren and Uncle Noah. We always have a fun time with them. I also got a chance to apologize to them for being standoffish when they gave their wonderful news. They told us that they thought of me, they prayed for me before telling us. Kindness to the max :)
We spent the evening in good conversation and then said our goodbye's to them with pictures and headed back to Grammy and Uncle's house. The next day we spent it at the park with Uncle Monty and Aunt Pam swinging and talking about the Lord and His word.
That evening they came over to Grammy's and Uncles house for dinner and more talking about the Lord. It was sweet, and one that we will remember forever. Uncle Mike, who is usually the guy in the background - as in usually keeps to himself - spoke and and asked questions about the Bible and about Heaven. It was something Gabe and I have never heard him really talk about, but know that he does.. Huge smiles were placed upon mine and Gabe's faces. We ate and Uncle Mike was going on how his grandson Isaak would make a great "Noodler". A person who hand fishes for catfish - you can check them out on the discovery channel (i think)...
The night ended, Uncle Monty and Aunt Pam went home. Uncle Mike and Grammy went to bed and we followed a bit after them. We shared a room with Cora and were not ready to go in there yet ;)
The next morning was normal - we got up. Got ready. Got kids up. Got them ready. Said good morning to Uncle Mike - the early riser - and left to meet Wendy and Milo at the Way Station for breakfast.
We spent our day at the mall then at Wendy's house so we could relax and the kids could get their wiggles out.
I received a text from my sister while we were at the mall saying that Mike collapsed and was being taken to the hospital. She didnt have any other information then that. While at Wendy's house i received a call from Grammy's friend that Uncle Mike had passed away.
Mike was in great shape. He took care of himself, after he decided to retire he started working out. His wife fed him well. He was healthy. He had a check up a few months prior and passed with flying colors.
He literally collapsed and passed away suddenly from a heart attack. No one could understand why this happened. No one could wrap their minds and hearts around the idea that this man who was in pretty good shape, could all of a sudden without any signs not be here anymore.
It was God's timing. God said he was ready. We don't have to be sick, or injured. God's timing is perfect. Albeit, we sometimes have a problem with Him taking our loved one's. But, He is good, loving, caring. He knows us. He knows our hearts. From witnessing Mike's heart for the Lord the night before, he was ready. His wife knew he was ready. Even though it was devastating for her - she had peace in her heart.
The next day we continued on with our plans of spending the day in Santa Barbara with Wendy and Milo and then visiting with Aunt Bethie and the girl cousins.
Once everyone heard the sad news, ladies were in and out of the house all day... We got to witness her friends come along side her - which even though they all have not attended the same church since their kids were younger - they still are all there for each other. That spoke volumes to me. I saw these women come together in love and friendship. I loved that. My sister, her fam and mom drove down the next day so we moved out and stayed with Grammy's friend Pat. She and her hubby were amazing. They embraced us. They loved on us. They made us feel like we could stay forever (we totally would not have done that to them ;)
The evening before the memorial service i had a conversation with my sis about my LITTLE NOT SO FRIEND and how IT has not arrived yet. She told me on our way back to Pat's house, Gabe had to drive me to the Dollar Store and i had to take a test... She's so bossy ;)
So that's what we did. Got home. Took Test. Jaw dropped to the floor. It was positive. 5 1/2 months since loosing Joy and i was pregnant again. I heard from so many woman that they got pregnant pretty quickly after loosing their babies. I didnt see it possible. My mind and my heart were still sad, another pregnancy, another baby just didnt seem like it was going to happen for us. BUT IT WAS!!!
I was happy, scared, thrilled, nervous, already in love and at the same time not wanting to get attached. I pulled my self out of my battle long enough to call my sister. She was beyond excited - which made my battle seem to be less of a battle. I sent a text to 2 friends - who were again so excited. Gabe had a HUGE smile on his face - he didnt seem to be as freaked out about this as i was. He seemed happy. We decided not to tell anyone the next day at the memorial service.
The next morning Mom and I took the kids to meet Uncle Bill for brunch. We dropped Gabe off at the house so he could help set up for the Memorial Service.
I was on pins and needles all day long. It took everything in me not to tell my mom. We really did not want to steal anyone's thunder and it wouldnt be fair for her to not be aloud to say anything. We arrived at the house and people were already showing up. Noah and Brendie arrived, i told them ;) a sweet girl arrived and she asked, so i said yes.
The memorial service was sweet and relaxing. I took so many pictures. I saw so many people who i have not seen in a very long time. There was great food, smiling faces, tears shed here and there, stories told and old friends reuniting. It was a good day.
That night i told Grammy our news. She grabbed me and laughed.. She said that Uncle Mike would have been so excited and that he loved our kids. Everyone who was still there found out and showed their excitement for us.
We left the next morning. We picked up mom at her dad's house and i handed her the test. She was very confused at first (should have thought this through a bit more) and then i turned it around and it clicked. She was happy for us but, there was no doubt in my mind that she would worry.
The drive home was long but good - if you don't count Char throwing up everywhere....... yuck...
to be continued......
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